


Mamihlapinatapei

by fallengodtier



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-19
Updated: 2014-08-19
Packaged: 2018-02-13 19:32:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2162460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallengodtier/pseuds/fallengodtier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mamihlapinatapei - The look between two people in which each loves the other but is too afraid to make the first move. Based off of a writing prompt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mamihlapinatapei

**Author's Note:**

> This is a longish drabble I posted on tumblr based off of a writing prompt my friend sent me. It starts with Rei's POV, then switches to Nagisa's after the asterisk. Enjoy! :)

“Rei-chan?”  
Nagisa’s voice sounded tentative, something that Rei couldn’t recall happening – exempting the night when himself and the rest of the swim team convinced Nagisa to talk to his parents instead of running away.  
“Yes?”  
Rei and Nagisa made eye contact, and Rei saw a solemnness and possibly a bit of nervousness that gave Rei the impulse to wrap his arms around Nagisa, to hold him into his warm smile returns. Rei loved that smile; it felt like one of the first warm days of spring, soaking in the sun’s rays after what felt like forever, flowers sprouting up when just days before harsh winds were blowing, a waking up from hibernation. Nagisa was the first real day of spring for Rei, something Rei didn’t realize until well after he joined the swim team. And it didn’t take long from that realization for the next one to hit; that not only did he love Nagisa’s smile and his energy and the way he seemed so alive, but he loved the blond breaststroke swimmer. He loved him in his entirety, from his endless persistence to his bizarre love of strawberry protein supplement. Rei knew he would stay beside the boy who changed his whole life through the best, the good, the bad, and the worst.  
But Rei kept this all to himself. He didn’t want to risk ruining his friendship with Nagisa, not when it meant everything to him. And what about the rest of the team? If somehow Nagisa did love him back, Rei didn’t believe that the rest of the team wouldn’t be anything but accepting. Yet look at his parents. He thought they were accepting – at least more than some – but then he heard the tone of voice his father used when talking about “the gays” and the slightly uncomfortable way his mother acted around his two aunts that were together. But the worst would be Nagisa turning him away – he couldn’t bear that. So he resisted the urge to pull Nagisa into his arms.  
*  
“Yes?”  
Nagisa had been looking up at Rei for a few moments, but now Rei turned to him and their eyes met. The seriousness in Rei’s eyes matched Nagisa’s, but there was also a deep concern present in Rei’s that took Nagisa by surprise. He knew Rei cared, he saw it in the way Rei told him to tell his parents how he truly felt that night, the way he said that there was no way he was letting Nagisa leave the swim team – Rei’s exact words had replayed in Nagisa’s head over and over again every night since then, causing Nagisa to smile into his pillow. He saw it in the way Rei pushed him to see the truth, to be brave and honest about how he felt. He knew Rei cared, but it still somehow surprised him that Rei did. Nagisa felt like the luckiest person in the world, to have this hard-working, nerdy but adorable about it, observant friend by his side. He was amazed that he would be this lucky, that it was him who had Rei. The two had only really known each other about a year, but Nagisa knew that he couldn’t be without Rei.  
Despite the way in which Rei pushed him to be honest about his feelings, he couldn’t bring himself to confess his love for the butterfly swimmer. After all, hadn’t Rei told Gou-chan that he wouldn’t be in something as “illogical as love”? Nagisa had done his best to hide how awful he felt over the possibility of Rei being in love with someone that wasn’t him, the pit that formed in his stomach when Goro-chan said that Rei had a girlfriend. When Gou-chan had said that Rei was in love with a guy, Nagisa felt a bit better, knowing that being with Rei like that wasn’t an impossibility, but still, for it to not be him…the possibility of it tore him apart. Nagisa kept these feelings inside, to be able to hold onto the hope of a them for as long as he could; the fear of losing Rei felt so awful that he didn’t want to risk it.  
“I just wanted to say thanks for…for convincing me to tell my parents how much the swim club meant to me.”  
“It was nothing. Like I said, there’s no way I would let the guy who badgered me so relentlessly to join leave the swim club.”  
Not being able to help himself, Nagisa pulled Rei into a hug.  
“Rei-chan, let’s work twice as hard at practice today, so we make it to nationals this year!”  
Rei look down at Nagisa and smiled, and there was an expression in his eyes that made Nagisa lose his breath for a second. It reminded Nagisa of the photo album of his aunt’s wedding, specifically of the picture of his now-uncle’s face when he saw his aunt begin her walk down the aisle.  
Noticing Nagisa’s stare, Rei’s face flushed red. He took a step back, breaking the hug.  
“Erm, definitely, I will not rest until my butterfly stroke leaves the other competitors in the dust, both in terms of beauty and speed.”  
Nagisa began to run, but stopped about half a block later. He glanced back at Rei over his shoulder.  
“Come on, Rei-chan, we’ll race to practice as a warm-up!”  
Smiling, Rei followed.


End file.
